My dad recently told me that whatever I touch becomes beautiful.
It honestly was the nicest thing that I can ever remember him ever saying to me. Not because he doesn't say nice things to me, but just hearing those words resonated deep in my heart.
I long for beauty.
I long for perfection.
In a broken world that is anything but.
It's hard sometimes.
It's hard when you see broken things, situations, people, stuff, and you want to fix them. Sometimes you can, and sometimes you can't. Sometimes you have to meet the brokenness right where it is.
I love creating something beautiful out of mundane. That transformation it undergoes, the joy of seeing it change form, and radiate out that beauty.
I know that this joy is something special.
It's the same joy that God has poured out over me making me his beloved child.
I do not always feel the beauty of that promise. I don't always seek God's heart. I don't always love God with all my heart, soul, mind and strength, but from the moment he changed my heart to be his, there has always been an all consuming fire in me.
I am not made for the brokenness of this world. I am made for perfection. God's perfection. We have to live this life surrounded by sin, but because of God's great love and mercy, he has taken that sin and removed it as far as the east is from the west.
Untouchable. Paid for by the blood of Jesus.
I am washed clean. Made new. God's touch has made me beautiful, perfect, blemish-free. I can stand before a Holy God and bask in His marvelous light, because there is nothing that can keep me from being in His loving arms, safe, secure, and free. Oh! So, so free!
But as that new creation, I struggle with what else I could be doing, besides looking at picture perfect, picture perfect picture on Pinterest. Besides making ruffle tops or planning birthday parties.
I honestly don't have the answers. There are children in all kinds of terrible situations all over our country and world, and yet I struggle with how to help them.
I'm still processing the answers to these questions.
My heart loves adoption. The love story it is. The redemption seen in it. How God takes that brokenness and restores, renews, and grows it.
Yes, we are currently adopting, but I am constantly asking myself what ELSE can we be doing to reach them. Those lost ones. The ones that are being abused, broken, abandoned, malnourished. It's easy to forget their faces. The fact that they even exist when I'm surrounded by beautiful things.
I want to always be asking, seeing, loving with eternal eyes. With eyes that see the WHOLE picture. With God's eyes.
It's been exactly one month since we had our home study visit. We should be hearing any day now that we have been approved and will be waiting to be matched with the next little one for our family.
I don't know what God is doing, but I know it's part of a larger picture here. I can't save the thousands, but I can save some, and I will do whatever I can to make my heart stay with that cause, so that the broken will be made beautiful.
Keep your Heart with His Like these real life folks:
-Christmassss Time is Here
-Adoption Story Part 3: Met Ya Day (Pigtails and Incubator Edition)
-Zion's Birthday and The Day He Turned One
(I couldn't wait until Friday for this post.)